Tim's Tales: The donkey and the diary

Every night, after his owner has locked the stable door and retired for bed, the donkey clears straw from a corner of the stable, takes one look around to make sure nobody could possibly be watching, and opens a latch to a concealed box buried under the floorboards.

Carefully, he takes out the box and sits cross-legged, donkey style, his long ears twitching with anticipation. With a little difficulty, he opens the lid of the box and takes out its contents.

It’s a book. The pages inside are full of handwriting, because it’s a diary. The writing is untidy and the spelling atrocious. Actually, it isn’t handwriting, it’s hoof writing. Nevertheless, it is legible, and the donkey skim reads the last written page, to help remind him what the last entry said.

Then he reaches back into the box and takes out a pen, held firmly in his hoof. How he does this I cannot say for sure, but as I said, he is no ordinary donkey.

Then he begins to write. How he’d learnt to write I cannot tell you, because I don’t know, but as I said, he is no ordinary donkey.

He keeps the diary so he can keep a record of all the things he’s seen and experienced during the day, but also about his feelings about it. You see, most people never think a donkey notices much. But he does. He’s cute and passers-by will often call him over and pose with him for a photograph. He reckons he must be famous by now given the number of photos that have been uploaded to social media.

But the people always walk away, not knowing what he’s been trying to tell them. That’s why he came up with the idea of keeping a diary, so one day it will be read, then people will see more than just a donkey.

He doesn’t just write about what has happened to him, he writes about his feelings and emotions, both then and now.

Usually, he starts writing about his worries and anxieties, because he is a big worrier. Then, after writing down his worries, he reads them to himself and tries to see what he’s written in a different way. Then he writes down the same things but with a different angle.

On this day, for example, he wrote: “I’m really worried that my owner is going to forget to bring me hay tomorrow.” Then he rewrote it, saying: “My owner once was late bringing hay because she was unwell, and because of that I worry she will forget. But she still made the effort to ensure I was fed, as she has every day. So I don’t need to worry about that.”

That was just a simple example of what the donkey wrote. Sometimes, when he is feeling really heavy inside, he will take the courage to write about the things that happened to him when his previous owner didn’t look after him well.

He had been neglected and uncared for. The strange thing was, for a long time he hadn’t realised he was neglected, because it was the only life he’d known. But eventually someone did notice and took him away to the lovely sanctuary he lives in now.

He’s given barley straw, hay and grass to eat, his hooves are well trimmed and his new owner gently grooms his coat every day. She talks to him like he’s important and, for the first time in his life, he feels loved. That’s why he looks so cute now, whereas before he looked scraggy and forlorn.

So he should be happy now.

And he mostly is.

But there is still that haunting he can’t get rid of. He didn’t know what it was until one day he overheard the owner speaking to the vet, who explained what trauma was. The donkey listened closely and understood he was suffering from trauma. The vet talked about the importance of talking about it, but of course donkeys can’t talk.

The one in Shrek can, I suppose, but that’s just a made-up animation and it’s not really a donkey’s voice.

So that’s when he decided to write it all down. You may say donkeys can’t write either, but this was no ordinary donkey, remember.

He’s a journaling donkey, and his writing helps him understand his feelings and work through the trauma of his past mistreatment. He keeps it secret because he writes it for him, although perhaps one day he will share it to his new trusted and kind owner.

But in the meantime, it’s only for his eyes, and after writing in his diary, he usually feels better. Sometimes painful memories are brought up by his writing them down, and he has to stop for a while. But at the same time, writing about painful memories also helps take the sting out of them, and that’s good, because they have been stinging him inside for a long time.

But not so much now. Thanks to his diary.

He finishes his entry and puts the box back in the hidden place and covers it with straw again.

Then he goes to sleep.

If writing things down works for a donkey, it could work for you too.