Published: Thursday, 31st January, 2008 12:30
Alien Versus Predator: Requiem
By Narin Bahar
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Alien vs Predator: Requiem. Picture courtesy of Twentieth Century Fox.
Cinema Review
What happens when two sets of terrifying aliens land in one small American town? Whatever you've just thought of in your mind in answer to that question is quite possibly better and more satisfying than this dogs dinner of a film.
Starting pretty much where the last film ended, two Predators load several Aliens and a dead comrade onto a ship, intending to return to the Predator homeworld. However - in a twist that Ripley could have warned them of - the dead Predator was impregnated with an Alien before dying. Which, of course, bursts from the corpse's chest growing into a new hybrid monster which attacks the crew and forces the shop to land in a small town in Colorado.
Before his demise one of the Predators manages to send a distress call home, which sees a Predator warrior (Ian Whyte) despatched to clean up the mess – although by the time he makes it to earth the Aliens have escaped from the crashed ship and are making their way through the town slaughtering everyone they come across.
Being a big wuss I initially was a bit worried by this film - they were enough jumpy bits in the first 20 minutes or so that I was genuinely worried I was going to be hiding behind my coat and the object of mockage by my partner in cinema-going crime. But it really wasn't a problem.
As well as being the unluckiest town in Colorado (or indeed America), Gunnison has enough identikit characters to fill a book of cliches – misunderstood bad boy trying to stop his younger brother go off the rails? Check. Small town sheriff trying to the best that he can against a threat bigger than any he'd ever imagine? Check. Diner waitress just waiting for a better life? Check. The fact you don't know the characters – some of them have a total of two lines before they're eaten – means you don't care about their potential demises. It's a total schlockfest. Also, I'm not sure when members of the audience laugh at two of the deaths it's necessarily a good sign.
That said, the whole cast isn't unremittingly bad. Reiko Aylesworth (best known as Michelle Almeida from 24) does what she can with a sub-Ripley style soldier role, and Steven Pasquale as the town's bad boy turned leader once again tries to spin the Brothers Krause's directorial debut into gold. Shame he's got so little to work with.
Don't let the posh sounding subtitle (Requiem? What is this, an opera?) lull you into believing this is anything other than a shameless unwarranted sequel to a franchise which arguably should have known to stop at Alien 3. It's a bad sign when the best part of the cinema going experience is the Cloverfield and Jumper trailers which preceeded it. Avoid.
One star.
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